Unwanted Responsibility

Grandma came over today.. She was talking to my mom in Tagalog, but they told me later in English..

Dad might go to prison. Court is soon, and dad's lawyer wants /me/ to testify and /lie/ and say my dad never did drugs or anything bad.. because I'm the oldest child living and I'm almost legally an adult..

If I do it, I lie for my dad again, and just regret even more.. If I don't, he'll hate me.. and I don't want either.

I don't know what to do. I don't want to be dragged into this again and again..

Happyhappyhappy~

Last night and this morning were so great~ Happiest I've been in a long time x3
I didn't want to sleep last night, I just wanted to stay with her <3 It felt somewhat regretable logging off, I didn't care how late it was.
And if only she didn't have exams tomorrow T-T! This morning felt so great~! I can't wait 'til Phoenix x3

Aishiteru, Rei~~~ x3

Craziness Randomness Blog Post Title

Right, so Thursday was our last school day. Once again it ended as if it were a normal day, only I got to see Siria this time. I also spent most of the day with Anna (and Ray, who put knives to my neck >>;) I said "Bye sister!" to Anna when I left, and she replied with "Bye sis-.. I mean brother!" which we laughed about but still 3< I like how she actually introduces me to everyone as her brother though

Friday was graduation. Went to see Jazz and Liz. And PSP reached cap limit, I'll post about this later.

Wow... [PSP]

"I'm here for you no matter what. Even if we're not related, I still consider you my brother.."

Anna's my little sister as of now.. Haha, I think she struck something, I feel like I got a reason to be here now.

Thank you, lil sis

Updates, again [PSP]

-Seeing Jazz really cheers me up, though he's graduating soon so..
-Found a note from my dad, dunno if it was recent or from before he left, but it gave me some hope.
-Natalie cheered me up too (effortlessly once again), then surprised me with "You're a great catch. Any girl who doesn't see that is blind."
-Carah's looking out for me a lot lately, and notices when I'm even a little unhappy. I appreciate it a lot though, even if she reminds me of sis.. I gotta thank her later.

More later.

Holding On [PSP]

Life's been so tough lately.. yet also had its share of enjoyable moments. First, some of the bad..

-More family separation, mom hates me
-Dad disappeared again 3 weeks ago, no one's seen him.. most likely dead since he'd keep in touch otherwise...
- Not seeing Lauren again after 9 more school days.. My truest friend, I'll miss her terribly..
-Family problems, brother sick, being backstabbed..

The good I'll tell later, maybe.. I want to savor what time is left, then talk about it

The sunset is so nice..

><

Getting a social life in the middle of the school year sucks.. I don't want to go out of town for the summer now.. especially since Jazz is graduating and Lauren is moving to Japan come August. It's probably part of what's bothering me.. I really don't want this year to end. I'm probably gonna hate junior year.. and I'm so lonely in the summer.
I'm really uninspired lately, and don't feel very much. So if I come off as blunt, I apologize.. Thanks for understanding though, Ruki.
I need a break badly.